The Hidden Challenge: Navigating Life Without Driving as a Disabled Person
Being disabled comes with many challenges that most people never have to think about. One of the biggest, and most isolating, is not being able to drive.
Driving represents independence for so many people. It means freedom to run errands, visit friends, or simply take a spontaneous trip. For those of us who can’t drive because of our disabilities, every simple outing can turn into a complex logistical puzzle.
Even in cities with decent public transportation, accessibility isn’t guaranteed. Paratransit services are meant to bridge that gap, providing door-to-door rides for people with disabilities. In theory, they make life easier. In reality, how well paratransit works varies drastically from place to place and even from day to day.
When “Accessible” Isn’t Always Accessible
Canine Coach Cindy's Experience with Public Transportation
I’m grateful that the paratransit service in my town is generally good. Most of the drivers are kind, and the buses usually run close to on time. But sometimes, things go wrong.
A few weeks ago, I wasn’t feeling great but needed to make a trip to Walmart. My boyfriend already does so much to support me, so I try not to ask for help unless it’s absolutely necessary. I decided to use paratransit instead.
The first bus was 30 minutes late. Then, just as it was about to arrive, the app pushed the arrival time back another 30 minutes. I went inside to wait, trying not to get too frustrated.
When the bus finally came, the driver told me I couldn’t ride because I had both my service dog, Nick, and a folding shopping cart. The app only allows passengers to list one mobility aid or assistant apparently, having both made me ineligible for that ride. My trip was cancelled on the spot, and I had to wait another 30 minutes for a new bus.
Eventually, I made it to Walmart, but the struggle didn’t end there. I scheduled my return ride before checking out, knowing it usually takes at least 15–20 minutes for the next pick-up. The app said the driver would arrive in five minutes, so I hurried. But as soon as I checked out, the time updated again to another 30-minute wait.
What should have been a 45-minute errand turned into several exhausting hours.
The Cost of Waiting
That extra time might not sound like much, but when you live with chronic fatigue and pain, every extra minute matters. The energy it takes to plan, wait, and adapt adds up fast. By the time I got home, I was completely drained.
Paratransit is designed as a ride-share system, which means delays and detours are built into the process. Routes are automated, and drivers often have to pick up or drop off other passengers before reaching your destination; even if it means driving right past it. I’ve had this happen even when I scheduled an arrival time instead of a pick-up time.
The system isn’t malicious; it’s just imperfect. But for disabled people, those imperfections can have real consequences; missed appointments, increased pain, and a sense of being constantly at the mercy of things you can’t control.
Understanding the Emotional Toll
Frustration is a normal, human response to these experiences. Yet disabled people are often expected to be endlessly patient and positive. If we express exhaustion or irritation, it’s easy for others to misinterpret that as bitterness.
But the truth is simpler: living with a disability means constantly navigating barriers that most people never even notice. The extra steps, delays, and denials build up over time. And while gratitude and optimism are important, so is acknowledging that it’s okay to feel frustrated.
What We Can Learn
For those who use paratransit or similar services, know that your frustrations are valid. You’re not alone in feeling worn down by the process.
For those who don’t rely on these systems, consider what it might feel like to depend on them daily. A little empathy, such as offering a ride when you can, being patient when someone’s late, or simply listening without judgment, can go a long way.
Accessibility isn’t just about ramps, apps, or buses. It’s about compassion. It’s about recognizing that independence looks different for everyone and that respect and understanding are just as important as physical access.
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